Driving Lessons

 No, don't be fooled by the title, I am neither taking or giving driving lessons, I am learning from driving some life lessons, I thought I would share. 

Yesterday I was driving home from a less than pleasant appointment with my therapist-there, I said it, I am seeing someone. I really need to, it has help immensely to get me through the tough times of my life without a partner. So, I am driving along in my new car-there, I said it, I have a new car (I haven't told a lot of people that because frankly, I didn't need a new car and feel stupid to have gone out and justified getting one.) The car has some new features that I am still getting used to. Jim had wanted me to have a car that had every imaginable safety feature on it-one of my justification points. This car has adaptive cruise control. If you don't know what that is, let me explain. It is optional when you use your cruise control to set it to slow down if you are approaching a vehicle that is moving slower than you. It takes the common sense approach to driving in that it keeps you from getting into someone's trunk unintentionally. The drawback is, the driver either pays attention and makes adjustments, or the car does it for you by slowing you down whether you want it to or not. There are other features in this car that make it so safe, I will not expound. 

Yesterday as I was driving home on the interstate, I had the adaptive cruise control on. I noticed there were several cars in the lane in front of me that had slowed down. I decided that the speed of the cars in front of me were reacting to heavier traffic, construction, trucks, or some other good reason to be slowing. I let the car do its thing. Granted, let me assure you, this whole event took maybe 20 seconds tops, I didn't just sit there and let my car decide everything for me. As I drove, I realized the left lane was moving right along, no slowing, no traffic, nothing. So, I changed lanes. The car adjusted to the set speed and I was on my way. I looked over in the right lane as I passed two cars driving slower than the posted speed. No reason that I could see. I drove a little further and then the message hit me. 

We tend to do this in life. We sit in the comfort of the right lane, we allow someone else to decide for us what speed we move at. We don't assess the situation and adjust ourselves, we just keep going along-or, we change lanes. I realized how too many times I am that person in the car in the right lane, letting the car decide for me what is best. I am trying very hard to change the lane I am in. I must admit, this is hard. It is easier to just keep riding along, going with the flow, accepting what is handed to me. However, is that getting me to where I really need to be? It may lead there, but it might not be the best way to get there. 

I think God gave me that word picture so that I would start to look at what He wants for me that is not the same old thing, not the slowing down because there is an obstacle in front of me. Do I need to change lanes? Do you need to change lanes? It isn't easy, it may lead to something we don't expect, but it also may get us to where we need to be with less time and energy expended. 

I am going to start praying that God shows me the lane I am to be in and gives me the strength to get there and stay there. 

How I Learned How to Pray-(Confessions of a second grader)

 I was a second grader. I had a teacher who every morning would ask some of the students individually and in front of the class what time they went to bed the night before. Now I get it, bedtime and sleep are so important for a growing brain and and vital in helping to use that brain better. Do you know, that was over 50 years ago and the thoughts of that particular exercise is all I remember learning in second grade? 

Because, I had parents who didn’t stress an early bedtime. I usually went to bed by 10:00 pm and rarely before that. It worked, I always felt rested when I awoke in the morning. I was really fine. Then, the dreaded question. If I was the “elected” one, I so dreaded telling her that I ended my previous day at 10:00 pm instead of her recommended 8:00 pm. Usually my stomach was in knots every morning as I waited to see who was going to be interrogated. 

I am writing this to tell you what I learned in second grade. I learned how not to pray. Yes, you may think that something so traumatic would make me become really good at praying. I would every night go to bed and really beg God that Mrs. Davis (and why can I remember her name?) would not ask me the “question”. That was the only thing I consistently prayed for. Every night, without fail. So, why do I say I learned how not to pray? My observation was this. If I prayed for her not to ask me what time I went to bed and that was the only thing I asked God for before falling asleep, she did not end up asking me the dreaded question. However, if I prayed for her not to ask me what time and that I would be a good student, or that I would have a chance to share my faith with someone, or any number of other requests that I had to ask God for, I would be the one. 

My prayer life as a second grader morphed into more like a rubbing of a genie lamp. It became superstitious. A sort of “if-then” game that seemed to work through the whole year. 

I wonder what I missed. I wonder still what a person is supposed to learn in second grade. There is only one other moment I recall from that year in school; a classmate reading in front of the class was suddenly in a puddle. I do wonder if she had felt the same shame and embarrassment that I had felt being quizzed in front of the class about what time I went to bed. 

I do know what I learned not based on curriculum. I learned a few things. I could not control what time I went to bed if I happened to be out with my parents. I was the youngest child and often times I was with my parents when they would go visit people in the evenings. We didn’t get back home many times before the chosen bedtime of Mrs. Davis. My dad was a pastor, my parents poured into people’s lives and often times that required spending evenings visiting other people in their homes. I didn’t have a choice of going or not going. So, I had no control. I was not in a position to tell my parents that Mrs. Davis requires that I get to bed by 8:00 pm and that they needed to cut their time short as they were possibly hearing the heartfelt concerns of the people they were ministering to. 

I also learned that a person can have a huge impact upon one’s life without really even knowing it. Did Mrs. Davis cause me to want to go to bed by her chosen time? No! I never considered changing my habits based on her questioning. I only relied on my trusting that if I never asked God for anything else, He would give me the desired response. She taught me the wrong thing about God, I learned how to put limits on what I could ask Him for and shrunk Him down to a human sized figure that really could not multi-task. 

I don’t think I ever told my parents about the frustration and the painfully embarrassing encounters I had in front of my class. If I had, they probably would have brushed it off as something I would just be able to handle. I did handle it, although maybe not the correct way. I developed a prayer life of knowing God was too small to be able to answer more than one thing I prayed for. If I asked for anything else, inevitably she would find me and ask the dreaded question. 

Thankfully, I passed the second grade and moved on to a teacher who didn’t ask any pointed dreaded questions. But more importantly, over the years, I came to realize how big my God really is and how He can handle whatever I throw at Him. Did he take me through the second grade to develop me into a person of prayer? Was there a bigger purpose that I was supposed to be a part of? 

Since the second grade, I would not even be able to start at telling you all of the prayers I have prayed and how God has answered them. Sometimes, when the prayers are not answered according to what I think is best, I will catch myself thinking I could have asked for too much. Maybe if I had stressed this one thing, it would have gone the way I thought it should. 

Thankfully, that is not how God works. He loves us, He knows what is best for us. He understands our misunderstandings. He doesn’t allow us to go places that would cause harm when we think we know what is best. My list is never too big for Him. 

Meat Loaf

I want to call this killer meat loaf...if you know me well, you know why. This is copied from a church cookbook and Terri Howard was the originator of the recipe. I have to give her credit. I have used this recipe hundreds of times (maybe I am exaggerating, but oh well!)

2 eggs beaten
2/3 c. milk
2 tsp. salt
1/4 tsp. pepper
3-6 crumbled crackers (I have used bread crumbs too)
1 onion, chopped
1 c. shredded cheddar cheese
1-1/2 pounds ground beef

Mix separately:
1/2 c. catsup
1/2 c. brown sugar
1 tsp. yellow mustard


Combine eggs, milk, salt, pepper, crumbs. Add onion, cheese, and ground beef. Mix well. Pack into loaf pan. Top with catsup mixture and bake at 350℉ for one hour. Makes 8 servings

I hope you enjoy.

Yard Ornaments

So, here is the story about the water spout yard lights that I have just created.

About 3 years ago, Jim found this idea on the internet about making these yard ornaments that look like a water spout. He showed the picture to me and told me he was going to make some for our yard. We went to Home Depot where we spent way too much money (in my opinion) for the supplies. We brought them home and put them in the garage. The box sat there. I reminded Jim that the supplies were there and he should do it. The more I reminded him, the more he assured me he would get to it sometime.

Well, sometime never came. I had forgotten about it until about a month ago when I saw the box in the garage. Then a couple of weeks ago I decided I should start organizing some of the stuff in the garage and make some room for other things. I found the box. I looked and thought about him not finishing this project and how disappointed I was that he hadn't finished it before he died. Then I thought there was a possibility that I could make them. So, I searched the internet for a plan and found one. I realized how easy the project was. However, I had the supplies for two and I somehow broke the light wire on the second one. So, I had to scrap it. I knew that would not be acceptable for Jim, he would have wanted two. So, I ordered lights and bought one piece I needed that I could not salvage from the other one. I completed it today and it has a different type of light that has settings that change. I am so pleased with the second one and thrilled with the type of lights I was able to find. So, I will just say this, the first one was Jim's and the second was mine...mine is better ;-)

Thanks for reading.

Cancel Easter!

I sit in my house during this time of quarantine. I strive to stay off Facebook and find myself there at  least 20 times a day. I want to let go, but I cannot. I fear I may miss some critical update or funny meme that someone else posted. Or, I am just bored and don't really want to do anything else. But, the longer I read, the greater my frustration becomes. It isn't about the "lock down" or whatever you want to call this situation we are in. It is about the comments regarding Easter.

Easter comes on the calendar every year. But, really, what does it mean and why is that one particular Sunday in spring so important? I know for some it is all about getting together with family, hiding eggs, eating ham, breaking the lenten fast, going to church the one Sunday of the year, dressing up in new clothes. But why? Why do we celebrate that way?

As I watched some people's comments over this past week, my heart was stirred. I saw where some people were complaining about the quarantine keeping them away from the normal celebrations they usually participate in, I see some concerned about not being able to figure out how to live stream a church service. Why all of the sudden is going to church or celebrating Easter so critical to those who really have no time any other day of the year to really celebrate the true meaning of Easter?

Then, the conviction set in. If you are at all familiar with the story of Jonah in the Old Testament, that is exactly who I could relate to. My thoughts were similar to his. If you cannot give any time to the Lord any other time of the year, then why is tomorrow so important? Just like Jonah thought the people of Ninevah didn't deserve the salvation of the Lord, so I found myself thinking,

"You people who don't bother any other time to celebrate the true meaning of Easter, you are getting what you deserve this year."

Whoa, did I just say that, think that? What in the world. The Holy Spirit spoke to me, that is such a Jonah way of thinking. Is that really what I want my message to be? I know in my heart I do not want that to be what I think or feel. I really want people to see the true meaning of Easter, I got caught up in the celebration mentality that so distorts the real meaning. This is my confession of that wrong thinking.

Unlike Jonah, I want to really have a heart for the lost. Those who don't understand the true meaning, the personal meaning of Easter. I have written many times in these blogs what that really looks like, I would ask you to dig deeper if you don't understand. Bottom line, we sin, we cannot pay for it, Christ came, lived a sinless life, sacrificed himself on the cross and three days later (Easter) he rose to conquer death, sin, the grave. Your part, accept the free gift that he offers and live a new life in him.

Thankfully, God did not make me sit for three days in the belly of a fish to come to this conclusion. 

Thoughts on a Friday

In these days of uncertainty and trouble, I really need to keep my mind and heart focused on what Jesus is saying to me in the quiet of my lonely house.

I struggle at times when I realize I am alone here, but yet, I know, I am never alone. Jesus promised me He would never leave me nor forsake me. I really need to remember that promise.

I struggle knowing there are so many suffering in this time and I am especially mindful of the ones who do not have the assurance of salvation. This weighs heavier on my heart than the thought of someone actually dying from Covid. My greatest concern of all is that no one slips into eternity without Jesus. If I say too many things (and that is always possible) I pray that the one thing that people hear from me is that there is a way to know eternal peace.

So, once again, I am going to put it out here. I know I have said it a lot, but you may be reading this for the first time and the message may be new to you.

God created us for the sole purpose of living in fellowship with Him. In Genesis 3, that relationship was severed because mankind listened to Satan and believed his lie. God was hurt by that choice, mankind continued to live in that broken fellowship. Then God gave the Law knowing that mankind could not do each part perfectly even if trying with all of our ability. So, then God offered us one more way to restore that fellowship with Him. He gave Jesus to us, Jesus lived a perfect sinless life and was the only way we could be restored. We cannot earn it, we cannot DO enough to gain that fellowship again. There is only one thing we can do.

Ask Jesus to be Lord of your life. Ask Him to forgive you from the sin that separates you from God. Believe in your heart that when you say those words, the work is complete. Don't wait until you think you have yourself all "cleaned up". Just do it willingly and sincerely.

It is simple and in these days nothing else really makes sense.

Peace During the Storm

Several weeks ago, when this whole thing started and the recommendations were to start social distancing, flattening the curve, safe at home, etc. I was quickly reminded of the crisis I had suffered shortly after the attack of 9/11. I refer to this often in my life because that event shook my world. I was a mess beyond all messes. When this all started with Corona, I vowed I would trust in God and not allow myself to go where I had gone in 2001.

Well, as strong willed and determined as I am, that resolve left me on Sunday evening. While I was at work there was an overhead page for a "medical emergency." That means, someone was dying. Then, of course, we all paused in our thoughts in realization that it was a person with the virus. Then, it became more real than ever. When reading reports about the death toll and those infected, it doesn't become quite as real as it does when you know someone is slipping away in the very building where you are standing. Reality!

Our future will no doubt lead to those close to us leaving this world too. We don't know where and when this silent killer will hit. I don't like not knowing, but then again, I don't really want to know either. It is a difficult view to balance. It reminds me of the teeter-totter and being up and then down and then up and then down. It is hard to hit that middle and stay there both on the playground and in life. At one moment I realize all of this is in God's hand ultimately, and then I push that off and I am doubting the security that I know is there. I am sure I am not alone in that uncertainty and conflict.

I read scripture, many have come to mind in this time. I cling to those verses that give hope and assurance that God will not walk away from this. I often feel it is His way of getting our attention. But, are we seeing that? Not everyone. That is another area I struggle with. What about those out there who will face their eternity soon, where are they going to spend eternity? How do we make sure the message of salvation is clear and available? How do we share it without sounding like "doomsday" evangelist? It is hard. Any time I spend with people, it is with people who don't have a relationship with Jesus. It is hard to draw from others when they cannot offer hope. That is when I really have to remember to trust in Jesus. I pray for opportunities to share the gospel, but those don't come often. It is a continual challenge and has become even more so with this pandemic.

I also struggle with the feeling that this may be the beginning of the end. If so, our mission is even greater. Not one of us is going to get out of this life and not face the judgement. How can that message be sent clearly and how do we do our part? This is a struggle I face daily. Am I doing enough? NO! I don't even have to think about that answer. So, I pray that I can be used and that the Holy Spirit would lead people to me to give them the answer to hope in a very dark world.

If you are reading this and do not have a personal relationship with Jesus, if you don't really have the assurance that when you leave this life you know you will be forever in Heaven, please consider making that a for sure in your life. It required not work on your part, it only requires full surrender to Jesus. Ask Him to take control of your life, to forgive you for your sin, and to live inside you through the Holy Spirit. It is as simple as that. No hill to climb, no works to be done, the work was done by Him on the cross. Please take His gift of salvation and be assured of where you will spend eternity.

Let me know if you need to know more.