First Significant Day

Today marked the first really significant day that I had to remember without Jim. Thirty years ago today I agreed and went on a blind date with the least amount of excitement and interest of any date I had ever gone on. I had my life planned out...perfectly. I didn't need someone to change that plan. Then, along came Jim.

I have written our story out in long form already, so I will spare you the details of that evening and the months that followed. I just didn't want today to be forgotten, I have had many thoughts running through my head of how today feels and how insignificant it would have been had Jim still been here to celebrate it with me. No doubt it would have been just another day in the life. I would have gone to work, he would have done whatever it was he did on Monday. So, thanks to his passing, my schedule was messed up and I had today off work. Thankfully, I have a friend willing to put up with my sentimental ramblings. A trip to Beloit for lunch allowed me to at least travel the path that Jim and I took that night 30 years ago. Things have certainly changed, but as my friend pointed out, that is what life is about, moving forward and not staying the same.

I have been thinking a lot recently about one conversation that Jim and I had early in our relationship. We had seen a movie that was filmed in Africa. Since I had just returned from a trip there before meeting him, my heart was still there. I commented at the end of the movie about how much I wished I could still be there. His words still echo in my mind and they are so true.

He said, "We will make our own memories." It was a simple comment that probably didn't take a whole lot of thought on his part, but it still lingers in my mind even now. We did make some great memories. We had good and bad, we had hard times and easy times, we loved and we fought. But one thing is for sure, we had a good life together, one I wouldn't trade for anything. He knew my heart and he did all he could to make me know how much he loved me.

Thanks for the memories Jim. I miss you!